Friday, June 14, 2013

The one with the Ex

And that catches us up to right now. There is a guy I have sort of been seeing the last two months. Not officially, mostly as friends, but with kisses most times, and more a couple of others, though we have not consummated anything! This guy is like the male version of me. We are like two halves of a whole, which sounds romantic, but is actually more like awkward, bumbling, goofy idiots. That's us. Scooby and Shaggy. WONDER TWIN POWERS ACTIVATE! We make one another laugh, we have fun. So much fun. We do silly things like walk on the beach at night, visit haunted houses and play mini golf. What could possibly be wrong about it huh? Well, enter the ex. Once again, I meet a guy right after a messy break up from his ex. Things advance with he and I and suddenly he needs to put the brakes on because that's not finished. There's no closure. And suddenly she's all apologies and let's try again and he is conflicted by feeling for her and me both... And we have the mess that is now. WHAT JOY. So, I am relegated to friend status, and frankly am grateful for even that because she isn't happy about it. He is seeing if he can fix things with her, they were to be married after all, it was a big deal. I wish I had never stumbled across him because it's painful to meet someone so well suited, but have them not ready to meet you. Maybe someday he will get closure from that and maybe it won't work... but who knows. Maybe it will, too. She's not good for him, and I can see that even objectively, but you can't fight feelings right? Maybe he and I are just not meant to be. Right now, I am hanging in there as his friend because I am not strong enough to let go of my Scooby just yet. It's painful though, really tough. So I am going to continue to date, because standing on the sidelines looking at him go with his girl is far too painful to prolong. I can be his friend, but I can't stand still :(

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